Hear the voice of the child, says judge as parents clash over choice of school

Tongue lashing for shocking treatment of would-be asylum seeker. Picture: Ekaterina Bolovtsova/Pexels

Tongue lashing for shocking treatment of would-be asylum seeker. Picture: Ekaterina Bolovtsova/Pexels

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The voice of the children must be heard, a judge said in a case involving the divorced parents who are at a tug-o-war and cannot agree on which school the boys should attend next year.

The Western Cape High Court said it is clear that the children are distressed by their parents' constant animosity towards each other and that they are distressed at the school they are attending at present.

Judge James Lekhuleni said an educational psychologist had to assess what is in the best interest of the children and which school would benefit them.

The expert also had to hear the children so as to know what is actually troubling them and what their wishes are.

Their teachers and the principal of the school they are attending at the moment, expressed their concern to the court over the children’s behaviour at school and said there was clearly something wrong.

The mother turned to the court as she wanted to have an educational psychologist appointed so that, with the help of the expert, they can decide which school is best for the children.

The father refused that the children be evaluated as he felt they did not need the stress on them.

The mother asked for an urgent order that the father’s consent for the appointment of the educational psychologist is not necessary.

She said it was important for the expert to make recommendations about a suitable school, as she and the father cannot agree on a school.

Their two sons are currently 13 and 15 years old respectively. The eldest son is set to start Grade 10 next year, while the younger son will begin his high school education.

While the mother wants expert help in choosing a school for them, the father, in refusing this, said the children need stability and security and should not be pulled from one school to the next at the whim of the mother.

Following the divorce in 2018 the children have moved between various different schools. The mother realised that the children were not doing well at the specific school they are attending at present and asked the permission of the father to move them to a more suitable school, but he refused.

An expert who the mother had appointed out of her own, recommended that they be moved to a school which they had attended previously.

The expert also recommended a few other schools as an alternative, but the father would have none of it. The school principal noted that it is evident from the teachers of both boys that, at the moment, they are both unsettled, distressed and disturbed.

The youngest child’s teacher reported ongoing behavioural issues, stating he disrupts classes and can be difficult at times. The school has indicated that his emotional wellbeing is a concern, and he is distressed and underperforming academically.

It is said that the eldest son’s position is even more concerning. He has difficulty falling asleep and, for weeks this term, could not sleep more than two or three hours per night due to stress and anxiety.

Judge Lekhuleni remarked that the case involves the interests of two children who are unfortunately caught in an unhealthy emotional conflict between their parents.

“It is essential that the children’s best interests take precedence over their parents' animosity and difficult relationship,” he said.

Judge Lekhuleni stressed that cases involving children require a thoughtful and sensitive approach due to their inherent vulnerability.

“In my opinion, a child-centred approach should be the primary focus in any situation involving a child. Formalities and strict procedures should be secondary to their wellbeing, as the centrality of the child's best interests must take precedence.”

He ordered that they must be assessed by an expert, despite the father’s refusal, and that the expert, after also listening to the voice of the children, must recommend the way forward.

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